Kyla McCullough

Thursday, August 13, 2009

A Family Again

The weekend has come and gone, it was a bitter sweet weekend. Of course, it was the anniversary of Kyla's Heavenly birthday, it was a weekend full of sadness, and it was a weekend that brought us a lot of thought wondering where God wants us to go in our lives.

Bret had a tournament this weekend for our church's league. It was a very interesting tournament... on the 8th, which was the saddest day for us, he played three games. Bret doesn't play sports half way, if he's going to play a sport he's going to go all out. This last weekend was the same way, sliding, diving, hitting, pushing, throwing, and shouting were all a part of his play. On Saturday he hurt his leg so bad that when it came time to sleep that night, he had to take some meds. and sleep on the couch... the sheets on the bed hurt too bad. Sunday came around and I woke with thanks that the 8th passed without too much sadness. Bret had to leave right after church to get to the next game... his team had one game to play and if they won they would play two more games for the championship. Our team was doing awesome and Bret, along with the rest of the team, was playing his A game. It was so exciting to see, and to watch as they were making their way to the championship game. We were two outs away from the big game when Bret, playing at short stop, ran into another player who was playing in left field... both going for the same pop up.

I think God was protecting the girls and I because at that moment they needed crackers. So we were looking for which kind they would want, in the cooler when we hear the worst cracking sound and someone yelling. I looked up and saw Bret on the ground with the entire team rushing to him and the other player. I waited for just a few seconds, because just an inning before, Bret slid into second base and he took a bit longer to get up, then normal. And when he came back to the bench, I told him, "If you would had been on the ground for a few seconds longer, I would have totally embarrassed you and been out on the field... don't do that anymore!" We laughed and as he spit dirt out of his mouth, he patted me on the shoulder and said, "I'm okay honey, it was a great slide!" I just rolled my eyes.

So the few seconds I waited by the fence, I really tried to remind myself that he was fine, yet he was just lying there. So, for risk of embarrassment by Bret having his wife come out on the field to see if he's okay... I booked it! Once I got to him, he wasn't speaking, it was more like mumbling... and I swear all I could think of was Kyla and what I had to do for her when she was in need. I started reminding him to breathe, and started to rub his back... thinking if he got the wind knocked out of him rubbing his back may help him breathe easier. I kept an eye on the other player who was rocking on the ground in pain, and I made sure my girls were behind me, Bret's face was bloody and started to swell. Thankfully someone from the other team started to talk with the girls, so they would be distracted.

Once Bret spoke, his first words were, "I'm okay... Brettie, I'm okay!" And once I heard those words the tears fell. I was so relived that he was talking and reached for my hand. It was a great feeling and made the worry leave, and once the tears were gone, my brain went into a different place. My next priority was the girls, and how I can get them home... I knew this must be tough on them to see daddy on the ground not moving much. Someone had called 911 and soon there would be an even bigger scene for them to witness. Once I got them taken care of, I had them come over to Bret so they could talk with him and see that he's okay, even though he was still lying on the ground. They were visibly upset and it was another opportunity for me to remember Kora's reaction to Kyla in the hospital. Kora had that same look and the same tears and I didn't know how to tell her that this wasn't the same. That daddy had gotten hurt, but that it wasn't the same hurt as Kyla. That he's going to the hospital but that he's going to be coming home. It was a very difficult thing to try and deal with in the short amount of time we had.

Bret got in the ambulance, and with God being with us, He gave us a new church, with a new team who didn't know us well, but who took our kids and was with them as if they were their own. The feeling of family at that church is something that I haven't felt in a long time. And speaking of family, as I'm in the ambulance with Bret to make sure he's doing okay as well as going over all of his information, I see my dad walk past the window. I open the door for him, and that's when he's able to see Bret with the bandage over his head and on the gurney.... he reached for Bret's hand and I think that's all Bret needed.

Once I said goodbye to the girls and reassured them that dad was alright, and Bree's tears finally stopped, I made my way to the hospital. While I was in the car, not only was I making the phone calls to the people we had plans with that night, and Bret's family, I went to Kyla. I started praying and asking God to make this situation the best possible outcome and not the worst. The EMT's were throwing some pretty scary words out to me... "skull fracture", "fluid in the brain", and "eye sight being affected". With every line in my prayer I was thinking of the other girl who was taken to the hospital as well.

In the past I have relied heavily on prayer, the heaviest I ever had and knew that God would hear my prayers and answer them positively. Well, since the answer He gave me was a "NO!" my faith in Him has faltered. I wondered why I should rely so heavily on Him if all he's going to do is take things away from me. So in the car... I didn't ask Him to make Bret better by the time I saw him, and I didn't make any "deals" with Him. I just asked simply for "both people in this situation to be alright and that they would heal from the injuries they have inquired today." When I pulled the curtain back and saw Bret laying on the bed, in the ER, all dirty from the slide he did at second and his cleats still on his feet... the relief hit me. I couldn't help but smile and hugged him right away. I examined him, as I did with Kyla, and decided to go to his feet, as I did with Kyla. That last night with Kyla I walked into the room and saw what a difficult time she was having and I went to her feet and started to rub them... so I took Bret's shoes off, put them to the side on the floor and rubbed the tops of them... dirty and all.

The night ended with the girls sleeping soundly in their beds, my mom had done my dishes, so all I had to do was feed the dogs and turn out the lights, and as I walked into our room, there was Bret on the bed. He was banged up, sore, and bloody... but he was at home, we were a family again, and God had answered my prayer, finally, with a.... "yes".


At August 13, 2009 2:49 PM , Blogger In My Opinion said...

God Loves you Brettie... He loves you and your family so much. He knows that your family has endured and that you are able to overcome. You have lived through the most difficult thing God can throw at a human. You take your steps each and every day. You grieve everyday, but still you Love and embrace your life!
You are one of Gods miracles.
As far as Bret and sports... What else can you say he tackles those just like he does life. Full on with 150%.
We love you


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